The Law Office of Matthew M. Williams, P.C.


1444 North Farnsworth Avenue, Suite 307, Aurora, IL 60505

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Three Ways to Avoid Losing Friendships In Your Illinois Divorce

Posted on in Chicago divorce attorney

b2ap3_thumbnail_oswego-divorce-attorney.jpgDivorce presents a complex set of challenges to couples, especially when they have been married for a long time. While spouses usually have their own friends, a couple’s social network is often made up of other couples, church communities, neighborhood friends, and parents of children who are friends with a couple’s children. Dividing these social groups in a divorce may feel inevitable and the loss of friendships can feel like a twisted knife in an already deep wound. If you are going through an Illinois divorce and are looking for strategies to help you maintain important shared friendships, here are three ideas that may help. 

Remember That Your Divorce is Hard For Friends, Too 

In addition to the inherent awkwardness of reconfiguring relationships without your spouse around, your divorce may cause your friends to feel grief and confusion as well. While that may seem unfair, social support groups are intimately connected and friends often rely on each other’s relationships to support their own. Be willing to hear your friends’ perspectives on your situation; it may give you a chance to step away from your own feelings, which can be a relief. 

Avoid Making Your Mutual Friends Your Therapist

If you have a great girl or guy friend whom you trust to keep your secrets confidential, feel free to speak to him or her about your divorce. But for friends you share with your spouse, it is best to avoid getting into the dirty details of your relationship. It puts pressure on friends to take sides and issue judgment against one spouse, which can make them feel uncomfortable and retreat from friendship with either of you. 

Proactively Maintain Friendships

A strange feature of human nature is that, when a friend is in pain and we want to reach out the most, we often avoid doing exactly that because we are not sure what to say or do. Your friends may be less communicative out of a fear of feeling nosy or intrusive, or may simply not know how to connect with you during this difficult time. Trust in your friendship’s history and take steps to proactively maintain friendships. However, if someone repeatedly rebuffs your attempt to spend time together or vocally chooses your spouse over you, be prepared to walk away. 

Schedule a Consultation with a North Aurora Divorce Lawyer

You will have enough to worry about during your divorce without wasting time wondering if you have competent legal representation. At the The Law Office of Matthew M. Williams, P.C., we make it our business to make the legal aspect of your divorce as easy and stress-free as possible. Prompt communication, thorough explanations, and a willingness to work with your preferences set us apart from the rest. Schedule an initial consultation with our Kane County divorce attorney by calling us today at 630-409-8184.


The Law Office of Matthew M. Williams, P.C.


1444 North Farnsworth Avenue, Suite 307, Aurora, IL 60505

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