The Law Office of Matthew M. Williams, P.C.

630-409-8184

1444 North Farnsworth Avenue, Suite 307, Aurora, IL 60505

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DuPage County divorce lawyer

Making the decision to end a relationship is never easy. Coming to the conclusion that a divorce is the only option typically takes months, if not years, and the possible end of your marriage can be a very stressful time of your life. It has often been said that marriages do not just break -- they deteriorate over time. If you are unhappy in your marriage, you may be wondering if it is time to call it quits, but it can be difficult to be certain that it is the right choice. Often, there are red flags throughout the marriage that you should be aware of that may indicate your marriage is not working. While there is no magic answer as to whether you should get a divorce or not, below are some warning signs that could indicate that it may be best to end your marriage.

One (or Neither) of You is Putting in the Effort

Successful marriages do not just happen. For you and your spouse to be happy in a relationship together, you have to want it. You have to get up every day and work for the marriage that you want and need. When one or both partners get to the point where they do not want to work on the marriage anymore, it could be a sign that the marriage is beyond saving.

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Posted on in Divorce
reasonsNothing lasts forever and in this day and age, marriages are included in that saying. According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC), nearly 36 percent of couples experience some form of marital disruption by their tenth year of marriage. By the time couples have been married for at least 20 years, that percentage jumps to 53 percent. Though those numbers seem high, some researchers have actually said that the U.S. divorce rate is declining. So why is the rate of marital disruption so high? Here are a few of the most commonly cited reasons that couples get a divorce. Marrying at a Young Age You have heard it before -- getting married too young is not a good idea. Many studies have shown that couples who get married when they are teens or young adults tend to have a higher divorce rate than couples who get married in their late 20s or early 30s. Infidelity This one is perhaps one of the more well-known reasons for getting a divorce. Cheating on your spouse can be the kiss of death for a marriage. When one spouse cheats on another, the trust between the two of them is broken and if you are already experiencing a weak sense of trust, cheating may be the end. Addiction and/or Substance Abuse Another commonly-cited reason for divorce is one spouse’s drug or alcohol use. When you are addicted to something, it consumes your mind and life. A partner who is addicted to drugs or alcohol can destroy the family and be the last straw for some couples. Financial Problems Many couples therapists say that one of the main reasons couples seek therapy is for financial issues. Many couples also say that money problems were the reason for their divorce. When couples do not agree on the way money should be handled, arguments can become heated and divorces can result.

Have You Been Thinking About Getting a Divorce? Talk to an Aurora, IL Divorce Attorney

 There are many reasons why people choose to get a divorce, but in the state of Illinois, you do not have to state a reason on your divorce forms. If you have been thinking about getting a divorce, you should talk to a DuPage County divorce lawyer. At the Law Office of Matthew M. Williams, P.C., we understand that making the decision to get a divorce is a big one that should not be taken lightly. Contact our office today to begin discussing your options. To set up a consultation, call us at 630-409-8184.

 

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Illinois divorce attorney, Illinois family lawyer,You can never be 100 percent certain that a marriage will end in divorce. There are so many mitigating factors that contribute to a divorce but a divorce does not happen overnight. It can take years or even decades for a marriage to degrade down and finally break, resulting in a divorce. There are certain behaviors that couples do that can be warning signs a divorce is in the future, but not all couples are created equally. What can mean trouble for one couple is perfectly normal for another. Here are a few things that could mean your marriage is on the rocks:

You and Your Spouse Are Constantly Criticizing One Another

Though it is something that we all do to everyone, criticizing your spouse should be done with care. When you criticize your spouse, you tend to criticize their personality or character, making your spouse feel like there is something inherently wrong with him or her. When you do this, you elicit a defensive response from your spouse, leaving you both unhappy.

You and Your Spouse Were Married Young -- or After Age 32

Many people know that getting married young is a risky idea -- some couples were meant to be and will last forever, but most couples will end up breaking up sooner or later. When you are young, you do not have enough life experience to know what you want. Alternatively, those who have been single for a while have an increased sense of independence and a need for space.

One Partner Thinks They Are Better Than the Other

There is a name for this -- contempt. It has been said to be “the kiss of death” to relationships because it shows a blatant lack of respect, appreciation, and kindness -- all of which are requirements for a happy and successful marriage. Examples of contempt can include name calling, eye rolling, insensitive joking, sneering and hostility.

You Do Not Communicate Effectively with One Another

Sometimes when a person does not know how to deal with something, they will withdraw from the situation to avoid conflict. This type of behavior is called stonewalling and can occur whether you leave the room or just completely shut down and ignore the situation. While this may seem like a good idea in order to calm down, it actually does more harm than good.

Discuss Your Options with a DuPage County Divorce Attorney

This list is not a comprehensive list of all warning signs for divorce, nor is it 100 percent indicative that divorce is where your marriage is heading. This list can help you examine your marriage and can hopefully help you determine whether or not a divorce is right for you and your spouse. At the Law Office of Matthew M. Williams, P.C., we understand how big of a decision a divorce is. Our knowledgeable and compassionate Aurora, IL divorce lawyers can help you determine whether or not a divorce is right for you. Call our office today at 630-409-8184 to set up a consultation.

 

Sources:

https://www.verywellmind.com/four-scientific-predictors-of-divorce-4045691

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Posted on in Divorce

divorceIt has often been said that marriages do not just break - they get weaker and weaker over time and eventually just fall apart. Issues can arise when one spouse begins to notice problems with the marriage, while the other spouse is blissfully unaware of the troubles. You have two choices when it comes to this - either mutually agree to work on your problems together or call it quits and get a divorce.

Making that decision can be one of the biggest decisions you will make in your life, which is why it is so stressful. Many times, the signs that your marriage is eroding away are not always obvious and can seem normal. Here are four signs that you should be looking for if you think it might be time for a divorce:

You (or They) Are Not Willing to Work on the Marriage

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Posted on in Divorce

Illinois divorce attorney, Illinois family lawyer, Illinois child custody lawyer, attorney fees,There are some people who like to say that they saw a divorce “coming from a mile away,” but the reality is that predicting the end of a marriage is not like picking a winner at the track. However, there are some who study marriage and divorce and seem to think that, like predicting the weather or the outcomes of sporting events, there definitely are some signs or indications that some marriages are more doomed to fail than others.

What Divorced Couples Have in Common

Just as most Super Bowl championship teams have a great defense or a game-changing playmaker, or World Series champs have great pitching and reliable defense, some social scientists have come to the conclusion that divorce couples also share certain aspects. While nothing is 100 percent certain, there is some credibility to their findings.

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Posted on in Divorce

Illinois divorce attorney, Illinois family lawyer, Illinois child custody lawyer, attorney fees,The reasons people divorce, as well as those why they marry, are sometimes difficult to put into words. Sometimes the cause is easy to pinpoint, whether infidelity, incompatibility or even abuse, but frequently one or both spouses discover some innate feeling that only makes sense to that person. Whether others believe you or not, when you decide that divorce is the right decision the reasons may only make sense to you.

Rarely Discussed Reasons for Divorce

As mentioned above, there are some pretty common and overt reasons why marriages fail. When one or both spouses cheat, partake in an extramarital affair, or place other things, such as work or time with friends, ahead of the marriage it often signals the end of that relationship. However, presented here are some common reasons people choose to divorce that, although common, rarely receive the attention they deserve.

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causes of divorce, divorced couples remarry, DuPage County divorce lawyer, remarriage, divorce processWhen one or both partners in a marriage decide to pursue a divorce, the thought of remarriage is not usually among the matters under immediate consideration. However, over time, remarriage is something  that many divorced individuals pursue, even remarrying the same person they previously divorced.

To some, the thought of remarrying the same person you just divorced may sound ridiculous. After all, whether the divorce process was amicable or hostile, so much time, energy, money, and emotion was spent settling issues such as alimony and support, custody and visitation, and division of marital assets. The reality is that some couples eventually realize, after time spent apart, that remarrying their “ex” is right for them.

How Does it Happen?

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The Law Office of Matthew M. Williams, P.C.

630-409-8184

1444 North Farnsworth Avenue, Suite 307, Aurora, IL 60505

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